January 2012 Newsletter

“The child builds his inmost self out of the deeply held impressions he receives.” ~ Dr Maria Montessori

DATES TO REMEMBER:
Fundraising Committee Meeting, Sun., 1/8/12, noon-1pm
Book Club, Sun., 1/8/12, 1-3pm “The Science Behind The Genius” by Angeline Stoll Lillard
SCHOOL CLOSED Mon. 1/16/12, In-Service
“Building Independence” parenting workshop led by Megan and Laura, Sat., 1/21/12, 9:30-11am – signs, cues and preparation for supporting your child as they learn to eat, sleep and toilet independently

“Life is the process of giving birth to ourselves.”
Eric Fromm
Happy New Year!

Tradition has it that we start each year reflecting back on the one just past and promising to start the new with resolve.

New beginnings … I’ve been thinking about them a good bit lately as I join my one pregnant massage client in waiting for the January birth of her son. I’m already in love with this little guy. I have the privilege of feeling him move during our massages. It is already a relationship… and I’m with him just once a week! The depth of relationship between him and his mom (his first “prepared (by nature) environment”) is truly extraordinary.

Nature – and millions of years of evolution – gives the unborn child experience of the external world. He has been experiencing stimulation of the skin, smell and movement from very early on in the pregnancy. He experiences his mother’s heartbeat, breathing and voice, as well as environmental sounds and he has taste experiences from about 3 months. Most amazingly he experiences light and dark from about 4 months on and his own mouth movement and REM sleeping from about 7 months.

With his senses of smell, vision, touch, hearing and taste already working before birth the baby is interacting with the external environment, the one into which he’ll be born, even before arriving here. His “new beginning” will be built upon his in-utero experiences. For instance, the sounds he’s been hearing – his mother’s heart beat, her voice, the voices of those close-by, music – all will serve as “points of reference” for him once he is born. He may be hidden from our view (except for those sonogram photos) but he is in relationship with this bigger world.

This got me to thinking about all the different “firsts” there are. A few for the infant include muscle control, intentional movement, grasping, rolling over, sitting, standing. Then there’s talking and toileting! The list goes on and on. Each new capability is built on effort born of an internal drive to become more. I imagine a newborn’s new year resolution to be something like, “This year I’ll grasp, turn, sit, grow teeth, feed myself and come to standing!”and then he gets busy at making it all happen! We should all be so lucky as to have such a strong internal drive!

How can we assist the child in meeting his “goals”? Well, for the infant, as Dr. Montessori said, “it would be enough for us not to put obstacles in his way.” Of course we do much more than that. We offer safe space for free movement, ‘developmental aids’ (ie toys) that encourage and engage him and our respectful attention – in other words, a “prepared environment.”

For the older children the materials Dr. Montessori developed hold a wonderful key: indirect preparation and the progression of concrete experiences to abstract understanding.

Just as the infant who arrives is touched by the influences of the external world, the children in the classroom are becoming readers, writers, and number manipulators through exposure to, and use of, materials that may not seem related to those “goals.”

For instance, one might wonder what grasping the knobs of the cylinders in the cylinder blocks has to do with writing. Grasping the knobs of the cylinders is an indirect preparation for holding a pencil. All the ‘sensorial materials’ serve in one way or another as ‘indirect preparation’ while offering a concrete experience. “Large” and “small” have a hands-on meaning while manipulating the cylinders. “Loud” and “soft” become clear while matching the sound cylinders, as do “heavy” and “light” while using the baric tablets.

With the senses developed and refined by the use of these materials, the child moves on to more sophisticated work just as the infant, with all he has absorbed during his time in-utero, moves into the bigger world, already in love, ready to put his 100 billion neurons to work to become fully human.

So, here’s to each stage! May each be filled with experiences that enrich the “new beginning” to follow!

Oh, speaking of stages – the baby was born on the 30th of December and I got to be there! Each stage of labor leading beautifully to the next until that little sweetheart was in his mother’s arms. Love. Fully human. Fantastic!

“The study of love and its utilization will lead us to the source from which it springs, The Child.”
- Dr Maria Montessori

For more information on Gio Bellonci who writes this portion of our newsletter, follow her blog Montessori In Motion

2011 December Newsletter

“With man, the life of the body, depends on the life of the spirit.” ~ Dr. Maria Montessori

DATES TO REMEMBER:
“Enriching Family Time” Dec. 4, 9:30-11am — led by Megan, Laura and Sharon
Fundraising Committee Meeting, Dec. 6, 7:30pm — planning for our 2nd Annual Casino Night, coming Feb. 4th
Annual Holiday Giving, Dec. 5-16 — once again SafePlace shelter for families is our recipient, donation box is in the lobby
Holiday Teacher Appreciaton — a) cash collection Dec. 7-16; b) pot luck luncheon hosted by parents Dec. 19 [information letters for both coming soon]
Trumpet Demo, Dec. 9 — Erik Telford, dad to Eliza, will share his talent
CPR and First Aid, Dec. 14, 6:60-9pm — only $25, sign up in lobby
Hannukah Traditions, Dec. 21 — Jordan Bookey, mom to Cassius, will share songs, stories and games with us
Ornament Decorating With Grandparents, Dec. 22, 3-5pm — grandparents or any beloved adult will join your child in their classroom to create a unique treasure
SCHOOL CLOSED FOR WINTER HOLIDAY, Dec. 23-30 (back Jan. 2)

Body and Soul

As the holidays approach there is much to do. It is a time for shopping, cooking, baking and gathering together to enjoy family and to reflect on the year that is ending. For many it is also a time to reflect on our spiritual nature even as we live in a physical body.

In my Montessori training course we learned that the development and growth of both the spirit and the physical must always be considered as we prepare the environment and choose the objects that go in it.

Starting with the beds on the floor in the infant room, and the push wagon in the toddler room right on through to the materials and furniture in the Children’s House (3-6) the Montessori environment sends the message that the child is a welcome member of the community, free to move and explore at will (within the limits of safety etc). This freedom to move and explore is what moves the supine infant onto his tummy, then onto his knees and then his feet. It’s what moves a supported walker to an independent one and a child who needs assistance to one who offers it to others.

One thing that is often challenging to give, though it is free and priceless, is time. The gift of time to move, explore and repeat shows the reverence, awe and respect due the child in the midst of such big work.

Stepping back and allowing time to be taken (as the gift it truly is), we are in the gentlest way giving the message that the struggle/work is recognized and it is worthy of the effort.

This is as true for the infant working on body control as it is for the child working on buttoning or tying.

Dr Montessori description of the child from 0-3 as a ‘spiritual embryo’ underscores the call to consider how we care for the physical body. For instance, during diapering, bathing, dressing, feeding, are we making eye contact, are we speaking slowly and clearly naming the body, the bath items and the food? Do we wait until the baby/child signals readiness or do we forge ahead? Do we show respect to his process or do we impose our wishes on him?

Addressing both his physical needs and the growth of his spirit is one of the things Dr Montessori succeeded in doing with the design of materials that are self-correcting, encourage repetition, are beautiful to look at and a joy to touch. The “aim” of any given material may be to master some ability, but it is also to build self-confidence and self-esteem. (“I did it!” … oh, what joy!)

When the physical and spiritual are in easy harmony all is happiness, but when on the verge of a new capability there can be some struggle and frustration. What are we to do? As adults, we often take it upon ourselves to “help” young children reach physical abilities they may not be ready to reach on their own. This push takes them, and us, out of the present moment as though it is not good enough. There are any number of commercially available devices encouraging us to put the non-walking child into a walking stance, or to put a child not ready to sit up on his own into a seated position. These are not what we would consider “aids” to his development.

It would be better to offer a ball to the not-yet- crawling child that engages his interest but doesn’t roll so far out of reach that his effort is frustrated rather than encouraged. An example of an “aid to crawling” might be a slow moving knitted ball. (see www.michaelolaf.net) An “aid to walking,” for instance, the push wagon by Radio Flyer, in the environment of a child ready to pull himself up and walk, serves as an invitation that he will gladly accept when ready. When well-meaning adults place the child in a position he can’t reach on his own we are undermining his struggle to accomplish the task at hand. This is all a very fine balance; we do not abandon the child, but we do allow him to struggle, because there is no greater feeling than that of accomplishment after hard work. Remember it’s “process not product.”

One of the best things we can do is provide an environment in which the child can safely explore through his freedom of movement, and place in that space objects that are true “aids” to the development of those movements, not just to the movement/position itself.

From The Joyful Child, this quotation:

“Children who have freedom of movement feel they can pursue their own ideas and interests. The repeated experience of seeing an object, reaching for it and exploring it with the hands and mouth, produces the reassuring sensation that when we want something we can move and go and get it. This is how a healthy ego develops, a human being capable of dealing successfully with the problems of life.

Self-confidence is an internal feeling of being able to rely on one’s own resources, which comes from the experience of active work done in the environment using free movement. It is the sensation of personal power in solving problems, and this feeling of power remains in a person forever. In the future, the aims will change (from reaching an interesting object, such as a colored ball, to doing school homework, and so on) but the psychological situation remains the same; something interests you, you need to do something to satisfy this interest, and you are confident that you have the ability to do so.

Active movements in the first months of life provide the overall mind-body experience from which self-confidence is derived, and with this very valuable instrument, it is possible to face all the challenges of life.”
-Dr. Silvana Montanaro, MD, Montessori 0-3 teacher trainer

We support the child’s desire to learn from his own actions by providing a space for his safe movement and materials that are beautiful and complete for his repeated use. In this way the child receives those things that speak with respect for his spiritual self (materials that are worthy of his exploration) and his physical self (materials that aid in his mastery of a skill). Together, in harmony all is happiness.

2011 November Newsletter

“Any child who is self-sufficient, who can tie his shoes, dress or undress himself, reflects in his joy and sense of achievement the image of human dignity, which is derived from a sense of independence.”
Maria Montessori

Dates to Remember:
Sun., 11/6/11, Daylight Savings Time Ends: clocks go back one hour; this can sometimes be a challenge for young children so it might help to adjust your schedules gradually all week
Sun., 11/13/11, 1-3pm, Austin Postive Parenting Book Club: “Parenting from the Heart” by Inbal Kashtan (the best parenting book ever)
Wed., 11/16/11, 6-7:30pm, “Non-violent Communication and the Emotional Development of Children” a parent education workshop led by Bettina Vaello, MD
Wed., Thurs. and Fri. 11/23-25 SCHOOL CLOSED FOR THANKSGIVING HOLIDAY
Wed., 11/30/11, 6-7:30pm, follow up to NVC workshop, bring your case studies
Sat., 12/3/11, 9:30-11am: “Enriching Family Time” a parenting workshop led by Megan, Laura and Sharon

As a massage therapist, my friends have become used to a few of my oft uttered sayings, among them “drop (relax) your shoulders” when I’m receiving hugs from them. Another one is what I call “the pesky rule” (of the inter-connectedness of all things) to explain in a most general way why when I touch ‘here’ it is felt ‘there.’ This “rule” really can be quite pesky when we want to do something and not think about the consequences. At other times this rule is quite liberating and brings into focus the more commonly heard “we’re all one.” This certainly has implications for understanding the deeper meanings of “community;” ie beyond “a group of individuals sharing the same space.”

Several things have come to my attention recently in a serendipitously inter-connected way. One being this quotation from Dr Montessori: “Bring the child to the consciousness of his own dignity and he will feel free.” It’s a sentence full of positive words that align with what we all want for our children; consciousness, dignity, and freedom. Sounds simple.

The second thing is the newsletter article, written by Bethany Prescott on whining, that Lisa sent out to Hawthorne families earlier this month.

Hmmm, whining, dignity, consciousness ….

Another thing that came to me quite unexpectedly was the loan of a book called My Stroke of Insight by Dr Jill Bolte Taylor. She is a neuro-anatomist who watched herself as she had a stroke. Her stroke and her 8 year journey to return to where she is today are the subjects of the book. When she lost left brain function she lost boundary definition and had instead the experience of ‘fluidity’ (where nothing had a separation from anything else – “everything is one.”

Hmmm, brain development/function, consciousness, dignity…

So, what is dignity? The 1st definition in the dictionary is: the state or quality of being worthy of honor or respect. And consciousness? One definition is this: the fact of awareness by the mind of itself and the world : consciousness emerges from the operations of the brain.

It would seem then that Dr Montessori is saying that when a child gains an awareness of his own worth he is free to be himself knowing that he has the respect of those around him.

This does not mean that those around him always accept every behavior without comment or guiding response, which brings me back to the whining child.

As Ms Prescott says (http://www.bethanyprescott.com/blog/) the whining child is expressing a real feeling. We can show respect to the realness of the feeling, and to the child having it, without standing idly by as whining worsens and nerves fray. As Dr Montessori also says, “To give a child liberty is not to abandon him to himself.” In her newsletter article Ms Prescott suggests using words that are not judgmental. For instance, “use your strong voice” instead of referring to the whine as a “baby voice.” This is one way to aid bringing the child to consciousness….

The adult’s role then is to respect the child where he is and to assist him in the development of his consciousness/awareness; to “bring the child to consciousness.”

We must remember that the part of the brain that is becoming conscious during the first plane of development (0-6) is doing so in response to experience in the environment.

By preparing a space that meets the true needs of the child we are acknowledging his dignity/worth and showing respect for it. This is also true when we make eye contact or get down to the child’s level.

So, what does it mean that when we “bring the child to consciousness of his dignity he will feel free”? Free from something? Free to something?

I think that he is free from judgment to a certain degree because he knows himself (consciousness) and he feels his worth (dignity).

And, perhaps, free to step beyond a given situation.

Another definition of dignity is this: a sense of pride in oneself; self-respect – two aspects of dignity that allow for those steps to be taken.

When a child is given the richness of a thoughtfully prepared environment – where he feels the respect inherent in having been provided such an environment – he carries himself with greater self-respect and sense of self worth, conscious of his role in the space/community. Here he is free to move himself forward (with the assistance of his guides, parents and family) as he engages in activities that he finds appealing.

Oh, that pesky rule! It’s taken me on a journey through Dr. Taylor’s book, through my Montessori training albums, to Ms Prescott’s website, to the dictionary, and to various other sites as well. The thread that binds them all together is the child who is, unconsciously in the years from 0 to 3, creating consciousness and a sense of dignity. As adults, we have many chances with our children to support that – even when there is some whining …

For more information about Gio Belonci who writes this portion of the newsletter, find her blog: Montessori in Motion.